Baby I'm Ready to Go

No one was happier than Aidan's swimming teacher today when mama panda did not play helicopter parent, ready to swoop down at any moment to save her baby from drowning. Why no swooping today? Because mama panda was not even watching. She was pacing the hallway outside the pool with her new ipod, totally energized with Republica's "Ready to Go." Over and over. Ready to go, baby I'm ready to go.

What happened? I dunno. Just two weeks ago I was still weepy, bleary, vertigo-prone, dazed and malaised, trauma and dramatized. Still recuperating from the diva liver deliverance, I suppose. Now, I seem to be like on some kind of adrenalin rush. It feels great. Like about time. You know how you get so sick of feeling sick. Adrenalin energy is much more enjoyable.

Maybe it's the ipod that Amanda and I are sharing. Very nice bonding thing for a mama and baby panda, by the way. Even got myself a play list, which Amanda helps me organize:

Ready to Go, Republica
Feeling Good, Michael Buble'
Rush, Ali and AJ
SOS, Rhianna
Hips Don't Lie, Shakira
Maybe Tomorrow, Stereophonic
Maybe Tomorrow live, Stereophonic
Maybe Tomorrow, Stereophonic (yes, again)
The Game of Love, Santana
Everybody Wants to Rule the World, Tears for Fears

Or maybe the power surge of attitude comes because in about two weeks I'll be having my throat slit, an occasion that from here on out I shall refer to as my Fancy Nap. And I am totally loving all the attention it's getting me! Cards, music, phone calls, visits, hugs, best wishes. . .all that. Even two lovely new scarves from my parents. It's really great. Thanks everyone! Why wait 'til cancer comes? We should be about this kind of intense relating to one another at all times, in my opinion. Baby, I'm ready to go.

So anyway, this ipod thing is great because you can download all these free podcast thingees, which can be utterly deadly for one who is already a public radio junkie. Practically have every section of the NY Times subscribed to my itunes account. They even have a podcast of the Gonzales hearings from last week, which I heard live so I didn't download. I listened live, by the way, to the dismay of my husband; and my colleague, Phil. What can I say, I'm a nut or a nerd or a fruity juice who just wants justice in the Justice Dept., especially one that says it justifies decisions on just regular folk based on just the facts. Baby, I'm ready to go.

I was also thinking about our LWR Virtual U speaker from last Thursday, John Nunes, and how he said that when you find your vocation(s) you will recognize it, because it's like returning home. It's in your DNA. It is something that comes so much from your core, and often can be covered up in so many layers. But you know it when you see it. It's how you must 'do life' as he says. The compulsion, combustion of your deepest passions.

And then, I realized that the Zenon Dance Company is located about two blocks away from my new downtown office. Dance company, you ask? Yes, I used to dance. A long time ago. Long, long ago. So why couldn't I again? I don't know. Let's see where me, my Fancy Nap, Bob's Fancy Nap, and the so-called call goes because Baby, I'm ready to go.

Thanks everyone. You're all fabulous and I am so blessed and happy and privileged that you are hanging in there with me and all of us. I'm sending good vibes right back at you.

With love, T

P.S. Next weeks' dispatches will come to you live from Baltimore, Maryland, the international headquarters of Lutheran World Relief, from where I will be working. Baby, I'm ready to go.