Contrary to This

Why am I writing this at 4 a.m.? Because I can't sleep. It's like the open heart surgery is done and so now can we just get on with it. I think Bob is being contrary. He says he's not being contrary. Maybe it's the medicines. Or that I thought we could just skip the recovery stage and move on to what's next. And what's next? If you could just write that down and pass it over to me. This is where I wish the divine would take some initative here. I am contrary. I am contrary to spending 30 years in service to the church, 5 years in seminary training, and 1 year in the Ph.D. of Sickness experiential education program -- I am contrary to all that for no good reason. I mean, c'mon, we got kids here. We need a permanent address. I need long term office space. A phone number that won't change. A place to unpack the boxes. When our kids show up at their same school AGAIN this fall the secretaries are going to ask, "So, what church denomination do you belong to? And why does it take so long?" Everyone asks me that. I started prepping people two years ago that we were moving. Now I don't say anything. Kids and seminary don't go together. Seminary training is not for families. The call process is not sanity-friendly. The purpose of seminary training is. . .could someone please fill in this blank. Oh no, you can't go outside the official call process, that would be breaking the rules. No breaking the rules allowed. We are the church. And how the church did not long, Long, LONG ago recognize Bob's pastoral skills, abilities, experiences and everything else and immediately put him to work is beyond me. We don't want too many inner-city teenagers and their families getting all connected up. OMG then the church would be doing its job. Ouch. We need good urban pastors, they keep saying. No one wants to do urban ministry, they say. Boo hoo cry me a river. Whatever. It is all contrary to anything that makes sense. God forbid that this would make sense. We'll just watch TV in our seminary apartment for the rest of our lives. Hello, is anyone out there?

Thanks for letting me ventilate. Not that there was a choice. T